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Docdoc Lizard Oil
Jeremiah "Docdoc" Hangoun, is the traditional healer who is a major player in the field of medication and meditation on St.Tosia. He received
the nick name after the "Docdoc Lizard Oil" that he is recommending to his patients as the bases for maintaining good health. The potion is made
after a secret and magic recipe of his great grandfather Hurriah Hangoun who was born behind a palm tree and deceased at the age of 83 after an
uprooted palm tree fell upon him during hurricane Mathilda.
The oil is applied on the skin behind both ears and then it will have its effect between the ears as the finely refined oil is quickly absorbed
by the skin and then slowly penetrates the skull. The liniment contains eicosanoids and it is common knowledge to any of Jeremiah Hangoun's
patients that these eicosanois are signaling molecules made by oxidation of twenty-carbon essential fatty acids. They exert complex control
over many bodily systems and as messengers in the central nervous system. And with this common knowledge it is no surprise that there is a
steady demand for the potion.
The bottles carry the label "Docdoc Lizard Oil" and the catchline "St.Tosia's Best for a Wealth of Health". The catch line was invented by the
island's marketing guru Nandan Mahasundaram. Recognizing the tremendous marketing opportunities, he teamed up with Docdoc. Nandan is a descendant
of the original indentured workers brought from India during colonial times to work on sugar-cane plantations in the Caribbean. Since slavery had
been abolished, a new legal system of forced labor was crafted, which in many ways resembled enslavement. Any breach of contract brought automatic
criminal penalties and imprisonment. For many Indians fleeing to the independent "Most Serene Monastic Republic of St.Tosia" was a salvation
because slavery in any form has always been a no-no on the island. Nandan is a brilliant product pusher. He introduced the king size bottles
of "Docdoc Lizard Oil". Docdoc recommends the ongoing application of the ointment and Nandan suggests buying big bottles of it. Team work.
St.Tosia being an island for off-shore finance dealings, Nandan believed that there was an opportunity that could not be overlooked. After a
brainstorming session with Jeremiah Docdoc, they came up with a variation of the Oil by adding an innovative magic twist. They added what
internally between the two of them they call psychedelic BS. The "Docdoc Lizard Oil with Bull Sacrifice" has the added magic for financial
gain. It opened a whole new market: clients seeking prosperity and financial advancement. It comes in smaller more elegant boutique style
bottles that are twice as expensive as the king-size bottles of regular Lizard Oil.
The new variation came over quite well in the circles of
wannabee millionaires which is a quite considerable large market segment. But also spiritual stock market speculators claim that during
economic turbulence the brew has cured them of everything from depression to seizures by applying the elixir behind both ears and let it
have its effect between the ears. When a client opens a new account of 250,000 dollars or more at the St.Tosia Caribbean Development Bank,
better known as the Caribbean Stashbank, they get a complimentary bottle of "Docdoc Lizard Oil with Bull Sacrifice" that has a stylish black
glossy little card hanging on a shiny golden ribbon from the bottleneck with just the two words on it in gold embossed Trebouchet lettering:
"Good Luck".
Cdr. Bud Slabbaert
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